Wake up!!

You feel most tired when you're woken up the worst way possible. This morning has to go down as the ultimate wake up torture schedule ever. Mom decided that it was time for me to get my ass going. Being the mom that she is, she opened the door, marched to the bedside and proceeded to yak in my ear, "Wake up fat pig!" Yes, that's what I hear often first thing in the morning. If my eyes remain closed, she'll go downstairs and force a cup of water on me and leave the room again, "Don't lie down when you drink, bring the cup down!"

I rolled over and went back to sleep for another half hour before I heard the door knob turn again. "Heileng~ Wake UP!" That, my friends, can only be Annie Su. She then flopped on the bed and told me predictably that I looked like (a) a mushroom (b) a polar bear (c) a koala. After that was total chaos. She began poking and pinching me where I'd preferably not mention so as not to give people any funny ideas. As if that wasn't bad enough, a scramble from next door is like the next wave of hurricane about to ruin my "beauty" sleep.

"Baoleng!"

Now this, is considerably new. Let me tell you how this came about. Originally, I was just plain "da jie" (big sister). And then I became Heileng. What that connotates to, I'll leave it to your imaginations and your mastery of dialects. You see, we (my sister and I) had a History teacher called Bhalvindher. On the other side of the story, my mom's nickname is "Kek leng" as in "keklengah" (Indian) coz she used to be dark when she was young. Not to mention that fact that her real name is "Suk Ling" and everyone calls her "Ah Leng" (hokkien). I was dark too, not anymore, but still, that's how most people here remember me by. Therefore, "Baoleng" is the latest trend at home. I tried to retaliate with "Baonie" and "Baobert". But somehow, "Baoleng Jit Singh Kaur" seemed to be more popular. I highly suspect that it's because they outnumber me 2 to 1. It'd better be. That History teacher was a nightmare. Then again, waking up like that, is worst than a nightmare.